EASTENDERS – Come back to me old friend!

CAUTION FOR ANY READERS OUTSIDE OF THE UK WHO ARE BEHIND ON EASTENDERS, OR HAVE ONLY SEEN UP UNTIL ABOUT 1996, DO NOT READ UNLESS YOUR OKAY WITH SPOILERS!!

Ethel – You two talking dirty?

         Den – You bet, Ethel, we were just wondering
what you look like with no clothes on.

                Ethel – I tell you, there was once a
time I could turn heads.

                              Den – Yeah, like the Excorsist!

Eastenders, what is happening to you? Why are you torturing me so?

If you have ever watched a TV soap before you tend to be in one of 5 camps…

    1. EASTENDERS 4 LIFERS
    2. CORRIE AND EMMMMERDALEE CREW
    3. NEIGHBOURS&HOME&AWAY69ERS
    4. HOLLYOAKIEZ
    5. SIR-MIX-IT-ABOUT-ERS [ mix and match ]

I just so happen to be in camp 1           anddddddddd          4…

I have watched Eastenders since before Ethel died, I’ve watched Eastenders since BEFORE Mark left with HIV, I have watched eastenders since before Sonia was a wee nipper!  It’s tradition, 7.30pm [or 8pm on mondays and fridays] comes along, you gravitate to your nearest TV settle in, either with dinner or a cuppa and you all come together to revel in the over dramatic, far from reality but ‘JUST LIKE HER DOWN THE ROAD’ on screen antics.

The favourite parts for me have always been the crowd pullers, the special occasion Eastenders where it would be miraculously extended to an hour.  Like Christmas and Easter and mid-year when something gets set alight or dumped in the canal or sent to spain.  I love the relationships, Peggy and Frank, Frank and Pat, Ian and Laura, Hev and Minty, Den and Angie, Grant and Tiffany….you were invited to watch their every step, you cheered them on and hunted them down, you cried when they started and you cried when they ended, you watched them come and go and eventually get replaced with lesser couples and ‘greater’ storylines that wound up just being not as good as the old days.

I still watch Eastenders, I love it!  Misty Knight and I used to have competitions to see who could get home from the boy’s house at Uni quick enough to curl up in bed, call the other one and watch Eastenders sort of together!  We would battle with the lad’s to watch it at their house and would always end up watching it late at night on catch up, avidly discussing it the next day.  Even in my home now, if we go away for the night or are going to miss it, you better bet your bottom dollar it gets recorded.  Then there is the ultimate, you’ve missed it all week, you’ve avoided glancing at every magazine, reading forums and hearing spoilers, you’ve successfully made it to Sunday and there you have it… 2 and a half hours of Eastenders joy with no breaks, flowing like it was meant to, like a minature Eastenders movie.

WHAT’S THE POINT OF THIS POST?

I hear you all cry, well as an avid fan, [and someone who would love to be a writer for them or even better act on the show, I HAVE A DEGREE IN DRAMA AND I’M AWESOME IF EASTENDERS EXECs READ THIS!!!]  I have decided that I’m bored.  I’ve been reminiscing about my favourite couples and have decided upon a little countdown my friends!…

TOP 5 EASTENDERS COUPLES…

PEGGY AND FRANK

Now anythign to do with Peggy has always got my vote, and personally I think the character left in a really weak way!! Barbs is one of my fav actresses in British history and the show honestly has a void without her there.  The show, I feel lacks a matriarch, Peggy GONE Pat GONE Pauline GONE, Dot is really the only one left and she is the sort of character that lacks the brassy quality that the others did.  Peggy and Frank were a match made in heaven and were the perfect couple.

SONIA AND JAMIE

Oh my, you know I still remember that fateful christmas when Jamie died, I cried like every other 90’s girl who thought Jamie was ‘propa fit’ and thought sonia was doing for every NORMAL GIRL out there by getting with him!! They were the epitomy of 90’s love matching, they were truly a Take That generation couple and you knew that at their wedding they would have had ANGELS by Robbie Williams as their first dance song!! SNIFF SNIFF!!

STACEY AND BRADLEY

OHHHH NO I’M GONNA CRY!!!  *holding it together* Now, Poison Ivy and myself have always had this long standing joke, that we needed to find a ‘Bradley’ and stop going for ‘Max’.  The Stacey and Bradders saga was one that we followed with epic proportions.  Awww didn’t she look beautiful on her wedding day 😥 Stace and Bradders weren’t without their troubles and had Poison Ivy and myself not had a massively embarrasing crush on Max Branning we would have told Stacey right off for cheating on Bradders with HIS DAD!!! tut tut, but he forgave her and then baby Lily was conceived [but not by Bradders :(] and then poor Bradders died.   IT’S SOOOOO SAD!!!!!!! ok moving on quickly…

ROXIE AND SEAN

Okay, now some people may think this is a weird one but for me it has the most relevance!! Roxie right now is going through a traumatic time, and her character is losing alot of her spunky nature than worked so well with Sean.  The writers at Eastenders need to get their butts in gear, and bring Sean back…HE DIDN’T DIE, WE WATCHED HIM WALK OFF!!!, Bring him the F back pleaseeeeeeee, we need his naughty boy character back and lose this ‘east end FAKE mafia’ thing that Derek Branning is FAILING big time at!!  Bring back Sean and mayeb him and the moon brothers can start it all up again, how it USED to be when mini den was around and Eastenders wasn’t SOOOOO predictable!!

AND FINALLY DRUM ROLLLLLL PLEASEEEEEEE MY FAVOURITE COUPLE AWARD GOES TO…………….

 PHIL AND GRANT MITCHELL

So here we stand at the number one spot.  Grant and Phil, Phil and Grant, When will they be together again, why can’t they be together again, when will Grant stop playing bestfriendies with mexican gangs and get back to where he belongs!!!  Grant and Phil were amazing, THAT’S EAST END BAD BOYS!!! Maybe they should supply Jamie Foreman [the actor who plays Derek Branning] with a back catalogue of the brothers’ antics and show him what a real Albert Square Badman truly is instead of his poor ass attempt that is stagnant and highly irritating!

SO THERE YOU HAVE IT MY BEAUTIES! My Eastenders TOP 5 Couples Countdown a nice bit of fluff for the weekend 🙂

Happy Blogging, Cheers for Reading,

L.J x

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“I Will Kill You and Everyone You’ve ever Met…”

Maybe I should have stated earlier, I don’t ACTUALLY want to kill anyone…
It’s a quote from the NEW series of Vampire Diaries coming to ITV…oops!

Haha, Soooo now that awkward situation is over, you know the one where you started to read this thinking I was a Serial Killer, kind of hoping you had stumbled across something insane when actually I was just cleverly diverting your beautiful attention to my blog post about what I’ve been watching recently, call it a mega-review if you will, sit down make your self comfy, get a cuppa if you’re feeling cheeky and settle down for my TOP 5 [5*s*t*a*r*] programmes to watch this year.

Some may already be on TV and some may give you a bit of a wait, but hopefully you’ll enjoy my rundown…

-: UK vs. US :-

BEING HUMAN
UK ORIGINAL OR US REMAKE?

Now it’s not often that I watch a TV series, on  TV, at a time which it is technically specifically supposed to be viewed.    Being Human caught my intrigue when I was doing one of my late night WordPress Benders, and the advert for season 4 popped onto the telly.  Not since Buffy the Vampire Slayer, have I felt such excitement over a BBC channel at 9pm.  So before it came on I got myself seasons 1-3 and had a marathon weekend [needless to say YES I’M SINGLE! AND UNEMPLOYED! that’s where I get the time]
Being Human (UK) is one of those shows that truly captures that part of you that still believes in Halloween and Ghost stories, that part of you that loves to cry Bloody Mary into the mirror when your pissed and Watches slayer movies on Valentines, but it’s the quintessentially BRITISH comedy that turns that into pure genius!
In the inbetween between my marathon slog and the new season I caught a few episodes of the US version.  Now although I personally prefer American Series’ I found that again although amazing in it’s own right (I LOVE THE VAMPIRE MOTHER!!) I feel that its the good’ole Brit Sarcasm and Wit that just takes ours to another level!

UK ALL THE WAY [BBC3 9pm Sundays]
* * * * * – One To Watch

Proper Sunday Afternoon Action...

WAREHOUSE 13
DOCTOR WHO MEETS CRIMINAL MINDS MEETS JACKPOT FOR SYFY!

Ok, Ok, I know not everyone has SKY or VIRGIN or one of those better than average boxes that lets you watch this…that’s why I’m not going to tell you to search WatchSeries into that search engine called Google because I am NOT recommending you should watch them online EVER! because that is breaking the law!

On the other hand, if you have already seen Warehouse 13 or not, it offers to its viewers face paced, exciting, action packed and historically  intrigueing episodes that journey you through history searching for ‘artifacts’  Warehouse 13 already has numerous seasons but it’s return in I think March of this year (don’t quote me on that) is being highly anticipated in The Common Tarte household!

[SYFY Channel]
* * * * * – One To Look Out For!

Alphas Review

What Heroes Missed Out!

ALPHAS
WHERE HEROES WENT WRONG, ALPHAS IS GOING RIGHT…

Alphas is one of those programmes, it harks back to the age old Superhero vs. the Government debate, and initially can seem very old hat.  “OH NO they can’t be ‘contained'” “The government are evil and want to experiment ahh!!” But, alphas provides it viewers with hard action.  There is simply no other way to put it, the powers are believeable, and highly creative, putting new spins on the average super-human powers showcased in show after show.  Alphas manages to do what Heroes couldn’t.  It lends itself to a character focused script instead of plot focused, which means its not hard to follow, its riveting to watch and it captures your attention every second.  My favourite character is Gary, actor Ryan Cartwright is PHENOMENOL!!! and Gary is one of those characters I could laugh and cry and fear for all in one episode! Top marks Alphas, catch up online with the first series and get ready for the Second coming later this year!

[SYFY Channel]
* * * * * – One To Keep In Mind

Misfits ReviewBest British SciFi/Comedy For Years!

MISFITS

THERE IS HOPE FOR SEASON 4

Yes, I admit, I am a Misfits slut! I love nothing more than settling down, turning out the lights, having a cuppa and a smoke and AVIDLY watching the next installment of misfits.  So before the haters seep out of the ground, SEASON 3 rocked!  Maybe you had to get some polyfiller for the Robert Sheehan sized gap in the show, Joseph Gilgun came on and made his own massively awesome hole himself.  I did find that we didnt learn ENOUGH about his power, and I was left at times with a sense of confusion, but overall I think the team did an Amazing job of making up for the vacuum that was going to be Sheehan’s Departure, Here’s to season 4 this year, may it live long a prosper and keep us on the cusp of all that is politically not-so-correct!

[E4/Channel4]
* * * * * – One To Always Watch.

Homeland Review

Don't Judge This Book By It's Cover

HOMELAND
YES YOUR RIGHT THAT IS THAT ANNOYING BIRD WHO PLAYED JULIET!

Homeland, Homeland, Homeland, Award winning, All Star Cast, Impeccable writers and 5* All American Hollywood Production, can you tell that I loved this series yet?

Okay, Homeland starts on Channel4 this week, but I have been lucky enough to already have seen the first season.  I will try VERY hard not to add any spoilers!
Homeland is truly a show to be reckoned with.  CIA, Terrorism, Marines, Suicide Bombers, Infidelity, Mental Health and good old American Spirit.  Homeland brings a whole knew perspective to the Terrorism subject.  The premise is an American Marine POW has been turned and is working for Al Qaeda, then what happens? They find an American Marine POW!  The writing is insanely clever, and the cast are AMAZING there are faces from across the world of film and television including actors from Criminal Minds, V [2009] and even her dainty self Miss Claire Danes.  Now I have a pet peeve, and that is Miss Dane’s bottom lip,  I hated it in Romeo and Juliet when she wakes up but doesnt save Romeo!! anddddd I hate it in this when she cries [can’t tell you why, SPOILERS]  Apart from Miss Dane’s lower lip I loved homeland, it’s ability to keep you guessing til the very last second is truly GENIUS and I’d recommend to anyone that they tune in this week!

[Starts: Feb 19th, 9.30pm, Channel4]
* * * * * – ONE NOT TO MISS!

Well, that’s it for today kids! I hope you enjoy
any of the programmes I have listed today
and if you want to pose a counter review
I’d be happy to hear your thoughts 🙂

Cheers For Reading,

L.J x